Building Strong Relationship

“You’ve got two ears and only one mouth,” my mom used to say. 

“So you should listen more than you talk.”

I feel like I’ve got a lot to say. And fortunately I have this letter to say some of it.

Because blabbing on and dominating conversations is the quickest way to lose connections with other people.

Everyone wants to be heard. And not just heard, but listened to.

There is a difference, you know.

The best way to become a better listener – and fast – is to stop making statements.

And start asking questions.

All too often (I’m guilty of it too) we spend the time when someone else is talking just thinking about what we’re going to say next.

But you’ll not only understand people better when you ask questions, it forces you to pay closer attention to what they’re saying. 

And they’ll see you as a better listener too.

If you slip back into old habits, and launch into giving advice or steering the conversation to yourself, stop yourself. And then own up to it.

It’s ok to say sorry, especially if they see you making an effort to be a better listener. And in turn, a better spouse, friend or coworker.

If you want to test yourself, try this listening exercise.

For a week, at the end of every conversation where there’s information being exchanged, sum up what you’ve heard.

It may not feel natural at first. But believe me, when you parrot back to someone what they’ve just said, it makes them feel like you care.

That means better relationships. And a stronger appreciation for the people in your life.

When someone tells you “you’re a great listener” what they’re really saying is “you care about me.”

And there’s no better way to show it than by, well, keeping your mouth shut.

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Comments

Linda - August 23, 2021

Thank you so much for the message on “Listening”. All of us need to hear that. I will put it into
practice in two days when I go for lunch with a friend. I have considered myself a good listener, but
I will catch myself up on it more from now on. A good listener is always appreciated, and yes, it does
make YOUR listener feel MORE appreciated.
Thanks again,
Linda in Canada

Debbi S. - August 23, 2021

In college I was fortunate to be led to a Speech class that was focused entirely on active listening. This has been life-changing in my outreach to strangers who seem distraught. I agree with Jeff… we all need to be heard. I am glad to read this post today as a reminder to me to be open to others more – even strangers. We are a hurting Country right now and many need hope. May those of us who believe in Jesus listen and gently share the love of God with the sad, the hopeless, the sick. Even the frustrated. But we need to listen first, so they are heard. Then they can hear what we say. You cannot expect someone to listen to you if you do not listen to them. God bless the USA.

Thomas - August 23, 2021

Thank you for today’s message, I read them often , but have rarely replied ! this message I felt was was laid out for me. I am usually a quiet listener and rarely give responses as I tend to keep running it over in my mind and by then the speaker has progressed onto something else. I am also guilty of as you said I tend to speak about myself and get off subject. I shall try to follow your recommendation in the future to be a better listener

Victor Vasquez jr - August 22, 2021

All to often I see this happening, it seems there’s always the ’one way conversation ’.but that advice resonates in me, and personally I wish to practice it, thank you, and good day.

Leland - August 22, 2021

The Speed of Soul

Can Soul travel faster than light?

Yes, instantly !

What you see as sunlight takes some eight minutes to get to your city. So light is slow.

Soul can make a journey in a moment, even to outer limits of our universe.

^From: A Modern Prophet Answers Your Key Questions about Life, Book 3 by Harold Klemp

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